We Need a New Word for Girls

Last year I was having a conversation with my spiritual teacher (a woman in her 50s), and I was about to bring up a YouTuber I was following which related to the discussion we were having about extraterrestrials (the YouTuber’s name is Bridget Nielsen, around 30 years old, and she’s fantastic).

The conversation was going along fine, but then when I went to bring up this YouTuber I stumbled: “Yeah,” I said, “there’s this… um… girl or… woman… I’m kind of at an age where I don’t know whether-”

“To call to someone a girl or a woman.” My teacher finished my sentence.

“Yeah.”

“Well, look,” she said, “I generally feel with the mentality of our society if you meet a female who is 25 or more it’s actually demeaning to keep calling them a girl.”

“Yeah I know, but woman just sounds so… formal.”

“How about lady?”

I screwed up my face, “No. That seems stranger.”

“I kind of feel like we need a word like “guy” for women and girls.” I said.

“Well, I know that in Aussie vernacular it’s “chick”, isn’t it?”

“Yeah I don’t find that useful.”

“Me neither.” She agreed.

“Well, what else is there?” She asked.

“Yeah, I think we need a new word.” I replied.

Laughter. “Alright, come up with it, Will! … Well what is it?” She paused… “How about fem?”

“… Maybe?” I said. I didn’t strike me as wrong straight away. “I don’t know… yeah that sounds alright.”

“Yeah, guy/fem. “I went on a date with a fem”” She proffered.

“Yeah, I actually kind of like that.”

“Well go on then Will, see if you can get it started.”

So here I am, seeing if I can get it started.

Now, I know “femme” is a word already used in the gay community to refer to a type of lesbian (i.e. butch or femme) (as far as my understanding of the gay community goes), but I think we need this word fem as an all-encompassing counterpart to guy. I think there is a gaping hole in our vocabulary which needs to be filled, and is important to be filled, so we can stop infantalizing women by continuing to call them girls when they’re clearly not still girls.

What do you think? Can we get this word started? Do you have any other suggestions which might work?

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